Honestly, I don’t even need to make fun of this. I wonder if Krispy Kreme will be there.
Max Harris “I Want To Get High”
Well, I believe that our good pal Krispy Kreme has met his gay eurodance match. I don’t know what about this I loathe the most. His carefully selected wardrobe of sweatpants, sweatshirt, and vest? The horrific backing track complete with tepid sounding synths and abused autotune? The “masterful” direction and performance? The stimulating edit? The inspirational message about “getting high” backed by such fucking shitty lyrics that it makes “I had to fight my whole life/I could beat you up even if you had 1000 knives” seem like an ee cummings poem? The fact that nothing in this whole track goes together musically?
No, it’s everything that makes me hate this. It is the great confluence of inept creative decisions backed with a fundamental lack of taste and good sense. Everything about this “music” video reeks of a homeless man’s fetid asshole.
Max Harris, choke on some fish & chips and die, you pudgy British fuck. I will enjoy watching your dreams die.
Tags: Max Harris
Love, hate or vomit in your mouth?
Why would anyone just bury or cremate their beloved pet when they die when they could turn them into flying “art?”
I can’t decide if I like this, due to the fact that I think cats are vile, disparaging, ungrateful creatures or if I loathe this because–when you look into that thing’s eyes–it just plain CREEPS ME THE FUCK OUT.
Oh, you say you haven’t had all the facts yet? Watch the video, then read this.
You’re My Best Friend…
The fuck. I haven’t even watched this shit yet. I am just going to put it here and let all your brains run with it.
Tags: Boogers, Krispy Kreme
Is this TOO mean?
I almost didn’t post this because I wasn’t sure if it is too mean to make fun of someone who is obviously so fucking damaged. Then I remembered why I started this site and put it up because I AM NOT A FUCKING PUSSY.
This shit sounds like what I imagine a late term abortion tastes like. Think about that one for a second. Yeah. I’d rather be that poor fuck in Florida who had his face eaten off than listen to this miserable cow sing her song again. Only 74,843 dislikes on Youtube? NOT ENOUGH.
What makes people do horrible things like this? Do they hate everyone?
Tags: NSFL, Youtube
“This is, I think when rap music first started… kind of.”
Who needs to heckle? He makes fun of himself better than I could make fun of him.
Tags: Krispy Kreme
The Facebook Song. The Video.
Oh god. No. What the fuck is this abortion? I bet Zuckerberg gets a chub every time this fucking travesty plays.
Tags: Facebook
Human dignity: ???? – 2012 RIP
Guess what guys?! I heard you were looking for a way to look like a tragic slob on your wedding day and then I discovered today that Ugg Boots is now making a wedding line. For real. Because nothing says, “I love you forever,” like making sure your little feetsies are warm and comfy on your fucking wedding day.
I fucking hate uggs, but I feel like my hatred has already been described by someone smarter than me more perfectly than I could.
I possess nothing but the sincerest enmity, the most profound disdain, the most resounding loathing for you. You inflict ruin on the feet and ankles of women everywhere, women gullible enough to believe that how they appear to other people is less important than that their little toesies are warm and cuddly. You are emblematic of the laziness that is ruining humanity. For every silly woman wearing you with tucked in sweatpants and a sweatshirt or North Face fleece (the gray and black one, you know the one I am talking about) I want to kick a defenseless puppy. I shed a tear for the future of the human race every time I see a pink pair attempting to navigate the filthy Manhattan snowbanks. I want to choke someone until I see the light drain out of their eyes every time I see a mother/daughter pair dressed similarly, wearing Uggs, and holding shopping bags. (via The Black Laser)
Beautiful, isn’t it?
Anyone who would tolerate people wearing Ugg boots to their wedding should be dragged out back and shot in the chest. Anyone who would wear Ugg boots to their own wedding, should be dragged out back, flayed, shot in the knees, and left for dead.
Seriously though. Head on over to the site and take a look at the beautiful fucking shit boots they’re peddling. Like this one!
"I love you soooo much, I wore ugly boots with SEQUINS ON THEM."
Or this one!
"These fuzzy wedding shoes are going to look great in our marriage trailer!"
Oh God, please, no more. No more, I beg you! What have I done to deserve this torture?!
Tags: Fashion, Ugg Boots
Krispy Kreme returns to drop further hot beats
Ok ok ok, look: if retard-hair, bedhead-having, booger-nose here isn’t joking, then I have suddenly become a terrible judge of character. But then there’s this:
I don’t even know what to think about this dimwit anymore. It just seems too perfect to be real, but not deliberate enough to be satire.
Let’s all agree that Krispy Kreme here is “the baddest,” that “all haters want to be [him],” and that he probably needs to move out of the Atlanta suburb where he lives with his parents. Oh, and, uh, I want to bet that “Money Maker Mike” isn’t making anyone money unless he’s asking if you want fries with that at the drive-through.
Tags: Boogers, Krispy Kreme
